______Garden Of Happyness`.

27.2.05

"I may be surrounded by a sea of people, but still feel all alone"
got it from somewhere. cant really remember.
Anyway thats how i really feel.
Everything is just merely shown on the surface.
But who truely know how i really feel...
No one.
Well if you think that my parents care alot
because they give me 'everything'?
Wrong. cos what they are giving
are things which i dont really need...
Well some may think being alone might be good.
think again... what if u have a serious problem
& have no one to talk to at all.
And the 'sea of people' come talking nonsense to you
how would you actually feel.
argh... why must it be me?
I think im not good enough for it.

Anyway that is just how I feel la...
:D
Went for training today
Coach bobby still damn good huh.
HAHA :p
yea yea.. then went lunch with kc.
beef beehoon.
like yumm.. hahaha
okay. then after that train more.
and then headed home.
and here I am.
Got no life, what to do.

"All my life, I have always been wanting to be more than myself.
But after I got to that stage I being to regret, because I am unhappy."

:(

shattered`* 27.2.05

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26.2.05

Now i truly got the feel of ' every cloud has a silver lining '
and dosent mean that life is better now and Im feeling happier.
Okay maybe I am always as happy as it seems. but no.
And im getting sick. dehydration
How bad can it get.
How can one actually get happy beacuse of status and money.
bullshit. I cannot take it anymore.
can you all take me more seriously and stop asking stupid questions?
like please? I've had enough!

Okay. enough of anger vent.
I guess i just cant stupid dirty attitudes the juniors are giving.
Full of crap. And sometimes i just feel like going away
especially after lesley told me all bout her life there now.
argh damnit.
Why isit that they have stupid attitude problems?
how the hell would i know.
Last 2 years of my secondary school life is gonna be tough.
call me a bitch or whatever I will still remain strict from now.
so if u got a problem. Just eff off? thanks?

And yes. I came home early today. sick. bye.

shattered`* 26.2.05

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24.2.05

Pheww. what a day...
Went to school early
to meet up with my 2 sec 1 leaders.
haha damn small damn cute la.
Yea. And then after that it was
a long dayy till 12.30
Went to the hall to have rehersal for invest.
Then it was the real thing...
Parents went to school.
HAHA yea the performance was so maluating.
: / i made a fool outta myself lah. HAHA damn sad.
Yup. Then it was the food!
the brownies damn nice!
HAHA me and eunice kept eating :X woops.
Then my parents left early cos they had to fly off
Yea. sad la but what to do. HAHA theres always next time
And i dont want to act anymore. I will just LAUGH. HAHA

And.. linn is so madness. haha . Love all of them. :D heart yall.

shattered`* 24.2.05

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23.2.05

hello people.
Well today was a terrible day
cos it started out all MADNESS
but a very good ending :)
oh well..
Woke up late cos i did'nt
set the alarm last night
cos i was down with headache
SO... everyone thought i was not going to sch
And so.. I woke up late.
Went to school
And got caught... Cried my saddness out
HAHA yea right.
yea anyway Had a taste of 'mag low'
HAHA all of yall will know what im talking about
if youre in ij sec 4
and let me tell you.. dont try her man
yup.. what a morning. pheww.
Yes after that was ok.
Long awaited for end of school finally arrived.
yup. met my fellow little kids hahaha!
and then took the charted bus down to
ST THERESA'S HOME
We had lotsa fun there.
And then after that me and linn went to MACS
And " played " for awhile and headed home.
home sweet home
And i miss my BUDDY lesley! :(

Got to know alot more people better. Love you guys :D do take good care of yourselves.

Heres a little message for linn...
Dont harm yourself cos you think no one cares cos i'll always be there for you. Maybe not always but I still hope i would be able to help the both of you.. You take care! and stop harming your self! :(

shattered`* 23.2.05

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21.2.05

† amen

shattered`* 21.2.05

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20.2.05

Went for party today
saw lotsa people.
Kelvin is retarded la haha
anyway went to tampines mall with my parents after that
Mum went to get a watch. All the way there.. blah.
And then after that came back home and SOMEONE called
and then followed by him it was Huiqin
what a perfect timing.
Some people are just that irritating what can i do.
biatch
whatever man. Get a life. I dont need YOU to control my life.
FUCK OFF
But anyway i know he wont even read this.
It helps me destress anyway.
I dont actually care much.
Yes. Now u know how i am when i am angry.
So dont provoke me.
I have so much to do and so little time!
I guess its better if we remain like that for sometime and not talk.
Taking friends for granted are just too common in my life.

you know who you are.

Hope things goes on smoothly. And thats all.

speech is silver; silence is golden.

shattered`* 20.2.05

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18.2.05

Today was an OKAY day.
Had pe. Did 2.4 DAMN lousy.
anyway went out after school
to suntec and then we went to eat at the foodcourt
hahaahhahaha!:D
then we went shopp shopp.
me and anna mama.
And then i went home. FULLSTOP.
im so tired.

*ijym- people who do not have late day on tuesday please msg me or tell me in school. THANKS.

shattered`* 18.2.05

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15.2.05

I miss my sister.
Today was an average day
didnt really feel like valentines
in school that is.
Dawn is damn sweet.
first to send Vday greeting
thanks heaps. :D
and Dearest Peizhen(PI)
came back to visit like finally.
haha so chio hurr.
:D
after school went for
cca leaders meeting
damn crap.
have to come up with some performance
for invest.
RAHH.
Cant wait for tmr.
got party. can eat pizza
:D wee.

happy vday to all.
;exhausted heart of mine

shattered`* 15.2.05

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14.2.05

When you were 1 year old, she fed you and bathed you.
You thanked her by crying all night long.

When you were 2 years old, she taught you to walk.
You thanked her by running away when she called.

When you were 3 years old, she made all your meals with love.
You thanked her by tossing your plate on the floor.

When you were 4 years old, she gave yousome crayons.
You thanked her by coloring the dining roomtable.

When you were 5 years old, she dressed you for the holidays.
You thanked her by plopping into the nearest pile of mud.

When you were 6 years old, she walked you toschool.
You thanked her by screaming, "I'M NOTGOING!"

When you were 7 years old, she bought you a base ball.
You thanked her by throwing it through the next-door-neighbor's window.

When you were 8 years old, she handed you an ice cream.
You thanked her by dripping it all over your lap.

When you were 9 years old, she paid for piano lessons.
You thanked her by never even bothering topractice.

When you were 10 years old she drove you all day,
from soccer to gymnastic to one birthday party after another.
You thanked her by jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, she took you andyour friends to the movies.
You thanked her by asking her to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, she warned you not to watch certain TV shows.
You thanked her by waiting until she left the house.

When you were 13, she suggested a haircut.
You thanked her by telling her she had no taste.

When you were 14, she paid for a month awayat summer camp.
You thanked her by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, she came home from work,looking for a hug.
You thanked her by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, she taught you how to drive her car.
You thanked her by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, she was expecting an important call.
You thanked her by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, she cried at your highschool graduation.
You thanked her by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, she paid for your college tuition,
drove you to campus carried your bags.
You thanked her by saying good-bye outsidethedorm
so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 20, she asked whether youwere seeing anyone.
You thanked her by saying, "It's none of your business."

When you were 21, she suggested certain careers for your future.
You thanked her by saying, "I don't want to be like you."

When you were 22, she hugged you at your college graduation.
You thanked her by asking whether she could pay for a trip to Europe.

When you were 23, she gave you furniture for your first apartment.
You thanked her by telling your friends it was ugly.

When you were 24, she met your fiance and asked about your plans for the future.
You thanked her by glaring and growling, "Muuhhther, please!"

When you were 25, she helped to pay for your wedding,
and she cried andtold you how deeply she loved you.
You thanked her by moving halfway across the country.

When you were 30, she called with some advice on the baby.
You thanked her by telling her, "Things aredifferent now."

When you were 40, she called to remind you of a relative's birthday.
You thanked her by saying you were "really busy right now."

When you were 50, she fell ill and needed youto take care of her.
You thanked her by reading about the burden parents become to their children.

And then, one day, she quietly died.
And everything you never did came crashingdown like thunder on your heart.

tresure them when u can : D love.

shattered`* 14.2.05

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I am back blogging again.
quite regular now already
cos' i like my layout!
mickey mouse.
I think it rocks la

back to school tmr.
feel kinda happy actually.
good. HAHA
anyway i dont know
if theres any assignments.
haha well.. nvm.

I dont know what the world is coming to.
Bye.

shattered`* 14.2.05

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12.2.05

MY SISTERS ARE COMING BACK YAYS.

shattered`* 12.2.05

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happy chinese new year all.
sup sup sup.
HAHA. okay
chinese new year was quite boring
kinda;
but then it was not that bad too.
Met up with all my cousins
& some long lost childhood friends
kinda glad.
And I had party at home.
and all the kids/ us
watched 'scary movie'
well... HA HA HA
retarded show.
And then friday i didnt go to school.
cos' the party ended at 530am.
all the kids didnt go. HAHA
well.. look at the parents we have.
:/ but they are good la. hahaha
anyway days been fine now.
kinda good. well anyway i havent
been blogging too. haha will blog
more often. see ya! PLAESE TAG :D

shattered`* 12.2.05

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3.2.05

Hello! I am back to update like finally. HAHA. Okay. so many things to say. we'll i'll try to update more often now. Yes. Anyway the camp was great. I think now everyone loves everyone more and more. haha yup. And to those with problems.. please do not face it alone! cos u all have mee. HAHA yes. i know i cant help much. But if i can, i'll try to help to the best of my ability okays ! :D yes. Quite alot of things are happening la. Morning run has started. With additional of 30 situps and 20 pushups. Ok how nice.

And PE is good. Soccer. I like.... HAHA :D very fun to be goal keeper. Anyway studies wise also.. try my best la. HAHA not all the time though. Anyway I'll try la haha. Just have to work hard i guess. not that difficult afterall. Wee. Very happy nowadays. With everything everyone. Okay maybe just one person. Shes irritating the hell outta me. and shes not from IJ. so dont assume. Yes. :D goodbye :D

shattered`* 3.2.05

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Shattered

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